10 Reasons You and Your Man Ought to Get Out of Town

10. So you can remember there’s more to the world than the happenings within your house.
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9. So you can eat somewhere that doesn’t have a playground attached.
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8. So you can be inspired.

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7. So you can pretend you’re dating all over again.
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6. So you can sleep without interruption.
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5. So you can get out of your house and see somebody else’s.
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4. So you can talk like grown-ups.

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3. So you can hang out with people you love, even if they’re far away.
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2. So you can re-connect with yourself, celebrating your own story as God has written it.
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1. So you can return to the routine refreshed, energized, and grateful, knowing that one of the best things you can do for them…

last collage…is to spend time with him.

Washington DC, 2013

What’s for Lunch?

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I don’t know about you, but I think lunch is the most boring meal of the day.  I am always looking for a little inspiration beyond “deli meat or peanut butter?”  So let me share one of my favorite go-to lunches.  It’s easy to make, loaded with vegetables, and my kids love it.  Best of all, it can be made ahead of time and chilled, so when you walk through the door at 12:30 and everyone’s cranky and starving you can say, “There’s pasta salad in the fridge!”

HOORAY!

Here is the super-simple method:

1. Choose your ingredients.  My family likes:

  • grilled chicken
  • broccoli
  • cauliflower
  • red bell pepper
  • carrots
  • kidney beans
  • avocado
  • asparagus spears
  • grape or cherry tomatoes
    (sometimes I put all of this in, and sometimes I just use what I’ve got)

These are some other things you might like:

  • mushrooms
  • olives
  • artichokes
  • black beans

2. While you boil the noodles (I use tri-color rotini), set a steam tray over the pot and lightly steam the crunchy vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, asparagas, and carrots.)

3. Once you’ve drained the noodles, return them to the large pot and throw in the steamed vegetables.  Add the beans, grilled chicken, avocado, and any other uncooked vegetables (bell pepper, olives, mushrooms, tomatoes…etc.)

4. Toss with your favorite Italian dressing.  I either use Olive Garden dressing (bought from Sam’s Club), or Good Seasons Italian Salad Dressing & Recipe Mix, which you can buy at any local grocery store.  It comes with a glass jar that tells you how much water, vinegar, and oil to add.  Very delicious.

5. Chill and serve.
photo-8Bon appétit!

Secrets of a Sinful Mom

Today is Mother’s Day and I am thankful for many things.  The way my baby sticks her cutest-feet-in-the-universe right in my face whenever she sees nail polish.  The adoration of a toddler who’s seen me at my worst and for some reason still wants to be just like me.  My own mother, who makes me brave.  The fact that I married a man who’s sensitive enough to show me his heart, but strong enough to take care of mine.

I am thankful for Nutella, and the moms in the grocery store who don’t stare when my kids throw a tantrum, and the miracle of instant streaming.  I’m thankful for this blog, and the inventor of sweat pants, and frozen yogurt you can pretend is good for you.  For older women who don’t panic when I tell them my problems, and young moms who walk alongside me, and single girlfriends who still like to talk about boys.

But of all the things I am grateful for this Mother’s Day, most of all, I am grateful for grace.  Sometimes I think about “high school Jeanne”–who had a heart full of passion, a head full of idealism, and seldom lost her temper–and I wonder where on earth she’s gone.  I wonder how I went from daydreaming about impacting the world for Christ, to fantasizing about toys that pick themselves up, and espresso that can be directly injected into your veins.  The truth is, I have never seen the depth of my own sinfulness and unworthiness with as painful clarity as I’ve seen it in the last few years.  Of course it’s always been there, I’ve just never been “squeezed” enough to let it spew out quite so badly.  Let’s be honest, “high school Jeanne” did not have children who loved to crawl all over her, and test the boundaries, and stick tiny objects into the DVD player.  Instead, she had oodles of free time, and a mom who did her laundry.

But here’s the amazing thing about seeing how incredibly awful you actually are.  It makes grace look BIGGER than it’s ever looked before.  When you have a dirt-high view of your own righteousness, somehow it finally sinks in that you didn’t reach past this tiny gap, up into the presence of God.  Instead, He reached down, down, down, down, down to you.  The gap was gigantic–infinite.  Which means the grace is gigantic.  Infinite.  Now that is a reason to rejoice!  That is cause to smile, and celebrate, and throw your hands up high in worship!

The more I decrease in my own eyes, the more my Savior increases (John 3:30).  And the more I put my hope in Him, the less I have to prove.  I am a weak and sinful mother.  But I have a GREAT and MIGHTY God, who loves me with all His heart.  Today, more than anything, that is what I’m grateful for.  Until I am old and gray, that will be the joy of my heart and the song of my life.

May Favorites

BOOK: Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver
mary-heart[1]This is the kind of book I could (and probably should) read every year.  Rather than give you my synopsis, listen to this excerpt: “The life of a woman today isn’t really all that different from that of Mary and Martha in the New Testament.  Like Mary, you long to sit at the Lord’s feet…but the daily demands of a busy world just won’t leave you alone.  Like Martha, you love Jesus and really want to serve him…yet you struggle with weariness, resentment, and feelings of inadequacy.  Then comes Jesus, into the midst of your busy life, to extend the same invitation he issued long ago to the two sisters from Bethany.  Tenderly, he invites you to choose ‘the better part’–a joyful life of intimacy with him that flows naturally into loving service.”

I first read this book as a newlywed, struggling to see Jesus in the midst of all the tasks before me.  Now, as a mother, the challenge is even greater.  This book is eye-opening, encouraging, and well worth your precious time!

MOVIE: Life of Pi

Life-of-Pi-Ending-Explained[1]At least when Tom Hanks was shipwrecked and floating around on a raft, he had a volleyball for a companion…not an adult Bengal tiger.  Based on the best-selling novel, Life of Pi is the story of Piscine Patel–his embarrassing name, his quest for God, and his heroing fight for survival at sea in the company of Richard Parker.  Beneath the fascinating plot and breathtaking cinematography, this movie poses deep theological questions about skeptism versus faith.  While I don’t agree with all of Pi’s conclusions, I like that this movie asks the questions.

PRODUCT: See & Spell Letter Board by Melissa & Doug
This toy was a cousin hand-me-down and we love it!  It’s perfect for 3-4 year olds learning about letters, phonics, and forming words, not to mention a great quiet time activity.  Buy it on Amazon for $17.
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ACTIVITY: Host a Homemade Pizza Party
This is an easy, inexpensive way to feed a lot of people, and have a lot of laughs and make a big mess doing it!  All you have to do is buy the ingredients and set up a few pizza making stations.  I bought the dough from the Publix bakery, but you could also make it from scratch.  This is an especially fun idea for a kid’s party since toddlers love to “cook”!
031044See you in June with more favorites!

 

Decorating Kids’ Rooms on a Budget

I’m no Martha Stewart, but there’s something really fun about decorating a kid’s room.  I still remember the first bedspread I picked out for my own room.  I remember decorating my first college dorm room, and I remember ordering my first baby quilt when I was pregnant with Aubrey.

Decorating seals memories into paper and fabric, pictures and paint.  It turns a house into a home, and a room into a haven.  And thankfully, it doesn’t have to break the budget!  Below are five easy ideas I’ve enjoyed in decorating my kids’ rooms, all of them budget-friendly!

1. Storybook Lanterns

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I saw this Pottery Barn original idea at a friend’s baby shower, and LOVED it!  The lanterns are charming, whimsical, and a celebration of reading!  You can use baby books if you’re decorating a nursery, or brighter Dr. Seuss-style books for a kid’s room.  I also used several free Chick-fila kids’ meal books to cut back on cost.  I got the lanterns at Michaels–6 for $14.99 (use the weekly 40% off coupon, and they’ll be under $10).

2. Canvas Paintings
In both my kids’ rooms I started with a favorite quilt and coordinated everything around it.  When it came to buying the pricey owl artwork to match Heidi’s owl quilt, my artsy mother-in-law took one look at it and said, “You can paint that yourself!”  (gulp!)  Turns out I loved it!  Not only was it cheaper, I got to choose the size and shape of my canvases to fit my wall space.  I will definitely use this idea again!  (See the final product below!)

3. Personalized Letters
For some reason, I just love seeing my kids’ names on their bedroom walls.  (Maybe it’s because we took so ridiculously long to choose them!)   You can design your own adorable letters, or you can pay my talented friend Jaclyn Anderson to do it for you!

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Another budget-friendly perk is that the letters can change with the room.  When Aubrey transitioned into a bed, we got a new quilt and I scraped off her letters then repainted and redecorated them.

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4. Framed Artwork

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P1060037Decorating with kids’ artwork is cheap, easy, and an extra-special compliment to the artist!  To make the Bible verse, we started by making Eric Carle prints, following directions from the imagination tree blog.  I cut the words out of the finished prints.

5.  Chalkboard Paint
This is a picture of our garage-turned-playroom.  It cost $9 to turn the entire lower portion of that wall into a chalkboard, and boy has it been worth it!  When kids come over, everybody can find a spot and go to town.  I’ve also seen people paint their kids’ closet doors with chalkboard paint, a really cute idea.  Just remember, chalk dust runs rampant, so it’s best if the room is not carpeted.

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A Romanian Bride and the Bigness of God

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Tonight we attended the rehearsal dinner of an American groom and a radiant Romanian bride, and I remembered again what I love so much about culture.  When I was little and my family went on furlough, I could step off the airplane and literally smell America.  I can’t put my finger on it, but every now and then it comes back to me.  Out of nowhere I’ll exclaim, “Clint!  Do you smell that?  That’s what America smells like!”  Clint doesn’t smell it.  But I do.  It’s the smell of specialness—all the specialness of America.

Tonight I felt the specialness of Romania, and I’ve never even been there.  When the bride’s grandfather made a toast, I felt it in the lilt of his accent—in the beautiful way he said her name.  And when her uncle and her grandmother spontaneously played the piano, I felt the peace and joy of a culture that knows how to celebrate.  A culture less bound by agendas than by the heart.

The truth is every culture is beautiful in its own way.  When I think of starkly different cultures, such as my mother’s Chinese culture and my native Filipino culture, I love them both.  I love the efficiency and order of Singapore, as if the entire nation understands the value of taking pride in all that you do.  I love taking my shoes off at the door, and eating my Aunt’s Chinese food in the kitchen.  And I love the exuberant chaos of the Philippines—the bustle, and life, and joy of a culture more enamored with people than tasks.  I recently went to Chick-fila with some Filipino women and listened to them talk in Tagalog, and reminisce about Jollybee, and felt for a moment as though I’d come home.

But my very favorite aspect of culture is the way in which it enhances the bigness of God—the vastness, and creativity, and incomprehensible depth.  With every glimpse of a different culture, I catch a glimpse into the heart and mind of a God more infinite than I can explore.  I will never forget visiting Botswana as a teenager, and witnessing throngs of African men and women worshipping God in their native language.  It was the first time in my life that it really dawned on me that God isn’t American.  And just like that, He was so much bigger, and so much more mysterious than I’d dared to imagine.  And all I wanted to do was worship Him right along with them.

Tomorrow morning, Bret and Sabina will be married.  And together we will rejoice in the God of Romania, the God of America, the God of all the cultures in all the world!  The God of the Universe.

The Mom Who Lies

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Believe it or not, your chatty toddler is not the most talkative person in your life.  You are.  To quote Paul David Tripp, “No one is more influential in your life than you are, because no one talks to you more than you do.  Whether you realize it or not, you are in an unending conversation with yourself, and the things you say to you about you are formative of the way that you live.” 

I’ve been thinking about this statement all week.  And I find it very unsettling.  The more I analyze my thoughts, the more I feel like Charlton Heston discovering that Soylent Green is actually dead people.  THIS is what I’ve been feeding myself?? 

The only conclusion I can draw is that by and large, I am a liar.  Unless I am very intentional, the steady stream of self-talk running through my mind on a daily basis is unbiblical.  Especially when it comes to parenting.  As a result, I often feel discouraged, afraid, and insecure as a mom.  Here are the two biggest lies I believe:

Lie #1: My children are a reflection of my worth and identity. 
Believing this lie is the surest way to climb on a rollercoaster and never get off.  I know I believe this lie when I ricochet between pride and despair depending on how my children behave.  Even worse, this lie produces selfish parenting.  I’m driven to control my kids because my identity is riding on their behavior.  At the end of the day, I’m not motivated by love for them, but love for myself.

And here’s a sad thought—how are we going to counsel our child through his identity crisis when our identity is wrapped up in his identity?  No kid needs a mom who falls apart every time he struggles.  He needs a mom who’s steadfast because her hope is in the Lord.  Only then can she lead, counsel, and be a model for him.

The sweet truth is, Jesus Christ bestows my worth and identity. O Lord, may this be the thought I tell myself the next time my children shine or disappoint.  May I grieve their misbehavior and be motivated to parent well because I love them and because I love You, not because I am insecure in my own identity.  

Lie #2: The greatest determining factor in my child’s spiritual growth (or lack thereof) is my performance as a parent.
If lie #1 leads to selfish parenting, I think this lie leads to fearful parenting.  And boy is this one deeply rooted in my heart.  It’s why I constantly feel guilty for turning on Dora instead of reading the girls a Bible story.  It’s why I pat myself on the back when we do a biblically-integrated craft or have a spiritual “discussion.”  It’s why I resent the fact that ungodly parents can raise godly children, and godly parents can raise ungodly children.  If I were completely honest, I’d admit that I want a guarantee.  I want to know that if I do X-Y-Z, then my children will grow up to love and worship the Lord whole-heartedly.

But the Bible teaches that salvation has and always will be in the hands of the Lord.  John 6:44 says, “No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him.”  Yes, I am called to raise my children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4).  Yes, I am called to train them up in the way of the Lord (Proverbs 22:6).  But it is not my training that will save them.  At the end of the day Jesus saves.  Not Bible stories and sheep crafts.

Rather than be scared by this, I am choosing to be freed by it.  Because the sweet truth is, nobody is more passionate about my children’s spiritual growth, or more capable of producing it, then Jesus Christ.  God, forgive me for foolishly thinking my children are better off in my hands than yours.  Surely I can entrust their spiritual growth to You.  I pray that You would draw them to Yourself, and empower me to demonstrate the gospel in our home, by Your grace and not my own inadequate abilities.

Final Thoughts
What would change in our lives if we started telling ourselves the Truth about everything?  Not just parenting, but the truth about our future, the truth about our status before God, the truth about our acceptance and forgiveness and hope for change?  What if we told ourselves the truth about the value in all the menial things we do all day?  The truth about God’s ever-present grace?

What if we started just by listening to our thoughts?  By thinking about what we’re thinking about.  And then choosing to think in a more Christ-centered way.  My guess is that you and I would be a lot more joyful.  A lot less fearful.  And a lot more fun to be around :)